“Dancing with the Stars” 2012 resumed April 30 with Classical Night, a slate of routines performed to the sounds of, well duh, classical music. By night’s end, nine more dances were in the books and a new leader emerged in TV personality Maria Menounos, who snagged the first perfect score of the season. Here’s a full recap.
The show opened with a performance by the “DWTS” troupe, set to the sounds of some serious violin-action by Joshua Bell. And then the seven remaining couples descended into the ballroom. Quick hit impressions? Katherine Jenkins looked a little scary in the Thor get-up. And Maria Menounos is teeny tiny.
Speaking of the opera singer, Katherine and partner Mark Ballas were up first to perform their individual dance, which happened to be the sexy Rumba. During rehearsals, Katherine shared that she first discovered classical music as an early teen. She called “marrying the Rumba with classical music” a challenge, but promised to “give it a good go”. Mark worked to make their routine “classy” but also “sensual”, and Katherine wanted to perform “an elegant, classy Rumba”. Hmm, sounds like a challenge indeed.
The two performed their Rumba to the sounds of Pachelbel’s Canon. Katherine’s costume was a little hefty-looking and distracting with what looked like heavy gold chains over her back, but there was indeed a lovely elegance about the whole thing. It was a good start to the evening.
Head judge Len Goodman called it “a classic Rumba” and praised them for being “totally in keeping with the music”. Bruno Tonioli called Katherine “the embodiment of power and beauty” and “literally the girl on top” all the time, but wished it could’ve been “a bit raunchier” to “get my juices going”. But still, he called it “technically superb”. Carrie Ann Inaba called her the best technician in the competition, but knocked her for not putting more “true heat” and “chemistry” into the dance.
Backstage with Brooke Burke, Katherine called the “DWTS” experience “amazing” and was pleased to be performing on Classical Night.
Katherine Jenkins and Mark Ballas’ week 7 scores: 9, 9, 9 = 27.
Hmph. Had that dance happened later in the show, it would’ve scored better. Mark my words. Actress Melissa Gilbert kept things moving with an Argentine Tango. Her injured partner Maksim Chmerkovskiy called his brother Val into rehearsals as a back-up, and Melissa felt the pressure of the situation. Still, despite the challenges, she asserted that “Maks is still my man”.
Mozart’s peppy “Marriage of Figaro” served as the music for the couple’s dance, which was probably one of the fastest Argentine Tangos I’ve ever seen. She zoom, zoom, zoomed all over the place. Good, because it showed she has good endurance. Bad because she looked frenetic again.
Bruno called Melissa “extremely brave” to “navigate the tempos of Mozart” but said she looked like she was “riding the Cyclone on Coney Island at times”. He called it “messy”. Carrie Ann likened it to “Cirque du Soleil went terribly wrong”. (Maks looked like his head was going to blow up.) Len appreciated how they’d portrayed the music’s crescendo’s with the lifts, but found it too intense.
Melissa Gilbert and Maksim Chmerkovskiy’s week 7 scores: 7, 7, 7 = 21.
No disrespect to either of them, but the scores were fair.
Third in line to perform were telenovela star William Levy and Cheryl Burke. The two prepped their Viennese Waltz, and Cheryl promised to include “enough content” for the judges. William had trouble with his injured ankle, and wasn’t sure if he’d be able to handle the spins. Cheryl worried that their “whole routine could fall apart” if he struggled on show-night.
But as it turned out, things went a-okay for the pair. Child prodigy Jackie Evancho performed their music, “Ave Maria”, and they spun around the ballroom beautifully. I still see William throwing the occasional pancake hand, but methinks the judges won’t really notice.
Once she stopped drooling, Carrie Ann said “that is what I was looking for” and appreciate the content and dancing. She loved how he was able to “bring the romance to life”. Len said he wasn’t transported to Vienna, but said he was in Austria. He deemed it an “up” performance. Bruno said “you have captured the purity and the ethereality of the song” and praised him for putting his “heart and soul” into it.
William Levy and Cheryl Burke’s week 7 scores: 9, 9, 9 = 27.
Bottom two survivors Roshon Fegan and Chelsie Hightower followed with an Argentine Tango. During rehearsals, Chelsie stressed the importance of being “flawless” and Roshon struggled with mastering the art of “being a man”. Val Chmerkovskiy paid him a visit to show him how to increase his manliness. Meh heh.
A musical version of Lady Gaga’s “Bad Romance” served as the backdrop for Roshon and Chelsie’s dance. (Which, I have to note, is the exact piece of music that may well have cost “American Idol” hopeful Colton Dixon his chance at the title. Just sayin’.) It was pretty good. It was hardly fair having him dance right after William, though!
Len appreciated the transitions into the lifts, but wished for stronger, less awkward feet. Bruno called him “Roshon the man” and asserted “size is not everything”, but agreed with Len that he needs more strength in his legs in order to ground his moves. Carrie Ann emerged from behind the table to give the young star a hug. She praised him for being steady on his feet and called the performance “fantastic”.
Roshon Fegan and Chelsie Hightower’s week 7 scores: 9, 8, 8 = 25.
NFL star Donald Driver was up next with his Viennese Waltz. Partner Peta Murgatroyd vowed to really challenge the football player, who expressed a desire to be the first to score a perfect 30, with a professional grade routine. The very competitive Donald said he planned to “give more”.
Vittorio Grigolo hit the ballroom to perform the couple’s tune, Verdi’s “La Donna e Mobile”. Donald was certainly more twinkle toes than not, and the routine-ending spin was aewsome, but there was something awkward and forced about his footwork at times. He’s good. But it wasn’t a 30-scoring kind of dance. Bruno declared that he “loved it”. Carrie Ann admitted that she hadn’t seen a lift, though she suspected one had taken place. She appreciated the “regal quality” of the dance. Len likened him to a “dancing Ferrero Rocher” in his red coat, but appreciated his footwork.
Donald Driver and Peta Murgatroyd’s week 7 scores: 9, 9, 9 = 27.
Performing next were Maria Menounos and Derek Hough with a Paso Doble. Maria missed the usual “jovial” nature of their relationship during rehearsals, and was visibly hurt by some of Derek’s remarks. Derek admitted to getting frustrated with his partner at times, but called her “a fantastic dancer”. Maria hoped to use their “dynamic” relationship to perform an equally dynamic Paso.
Dressed in a striking red gown, Maria began her Paso Doble standing alone. Derek approached holding a stake, and the TV personality revealed her fangs. Oh, how lovely to play to a popular pop culture trend. Well played, D. Hough. Well-played. It was good. Maria really got into it. Actually, it was almost scary.
Carrie Ann said “that didn’t suck, my friend” and “you were so on fire… Katherine had better watch her back”. Len called it “sharp as a razor, crisp as a Pringle” and “I loved it”. Bruno declared “The Queen of the Damned is the Queen of the Night” and called it “spell-binding”.
Maria Menounos and Derek Hough’s week 7 scores: 10, 10, 10 = 30.
It was good, yeah, but come on. A Paso Doble set to that kind of powerful music? Not a big stretch. I can’t think of many contestants who couldn’t rock it.
Last up in the individual round were actor Jaleel White and Kym Johnson with a Viennese Waltz. During rehearsals, Kym presented Jaleel with a talking stuffed animals in honor of his solid week 6 Cha Cha. But that’s where the jokes ended. Kym explained that she needed to put “a lot of content” into their dance in order to do well, and Jaleel expressed confidence in her decisions, calling them “an incredible team”. He vowed to prove himself “the man to beat”. Uh, okay.
Wearing military style duds and a pink dress (respectively, of course), Jaleel and Kym danced to the sounds of “Did I Make the Most of Loving You”. It was good, but not stellar. There was something awkward about Jaleel’s movements at times. Can’t put my finger on it.
Len said “I liked it enough not to be cruel” but not enough to be kind. He cited a lack of footwork and thought “it didn’t quite work”. Bruno praised him for attempting a lot of content, but criticized him for not linking his motions. He liked it as “a story”. Carrie Ann assured him that he was “back in the game” and appreciated the storytelling, but cautioned him against “a cringy” hand.
Jaleel joked that he’d initially thought it was the “Vietnamese Waltz” and hoped the judges would “show a brother some love”.
Jaleel White and Kym Johnson’s week 7 scores: 8, 8, 8 = 24.
With the individual dances out of the way, Maria and Derek sit on top with their perfect 30. Three teams are in second with 27, and the other three are slightly behind. Well, okay, so Melissa and Maks are pretty far behind with 21. But no one’s so far behind that they’re definitely in the bottom two. Cool?
While the contestants ostensibly changed for round two, the uber fun Group Round, Jackie Evancho returned to sing once again. That girl has some serious pipes. This time, “DWTS” pros Karina Smirnoff and Tristan MacManus hoofed it in accompaniment.
Up next, a segment featuring the team selection process and rehearsals aired. Captains Katherine and William chose their teammates one at a time, with Katherine first choosing Maria; William opting for Donald; Katherine picking Jaleel; William nabbing Melissa; and Roshon winding up on Katherine’s team. Ouch, sucks to be the last guy standing.
All of the stars on Team Tango –Katherine’s team– stressed. A lot of blither-blather. And then they performed together, all wearing black suits. It started off with Katherine “directing” them as they all held violins and pretended to play. Very theatrical. The ladies’ spandex pants really showed off their legwork. Or lack thereof, in some cases, but I won’t dwell. It was fun. Heated.
Len praised Maria and Roshon as the stand-outs. He called it a mix of “the good, the bad and the ugly”. Bruno loved the creativity of the choreography. He appreciated Katherine’s Argentinian influence and enjoyed Roshon’s performance. Carrie Ann loved “the concept” and thought Roshon in particular excelled.
Katherine called it “a joy to work with” her teammates.
Team Tango’s scores: 10, 8, 9 = 27.
Post-scores, Derek shared that he thought they’d deserved 10s and Maria thanked the pros for the choreography. Each couple earned an additional 27 points on the night.
Last up for the evening were the remaining three couples with their Team Paso Doble. During rehearsals, the burly-man packed squad joked about being the manly group and dubbed their competitors “Team Diaper”. Yeah, that’s just awesome. Blech. They stressed over whether or not they should take off their shirts. Seriously? I hope it was a joke. Really.
It looked like a typical Paso from the get-go. Melissa looked frenetic as usual, but it’s hard to be the only non-pro gal in the group, I’m sure. William looked large and in charge. Peta looked like she was battling Donald for the large and in charge title. Then they guys all lost their shirts and did the requisite Paso cape swing. I don’t dig suspenders over bare chests. Ew.
Bruno declared “more muscle power than the avengers”, and the men responded by jumping onto the desk, but noted that they’d lost synch at times. Carrie Ann giggled “that was so much fun” and declared that it would “go down in history as the fan favorite Paso Doble”. Len noted that “you three undressed to impress” and likened the performance to “fire and ice”. Uh, okay. No criticism? Are we out of time or something?
Team Paso Doble’s scores: 9, 8, 9 = 26.
Okay, raging and booing audience, that was a fair score. It wasn’t a perfect routine, shirtlessness aside. There were synch issues all over the place and the hottie fireman act doesn’t excuse them.
So how goes to bootville? My guess is Melissa Gilbert or Roshon Fegan. But you never know. Tune in to “Dancing with the Stars” tomorrow night at 9 to see what happens. Or you can just check in with me. You know I’ll be watching.
With women, things are obviously far from obvious, and when one has to talk about what attracts them, it doesn’t veer very far from the S-word. Yes, even a slight mention of shopping can have the most tired woman reach out for her bag, and they’re out and about in a jiffy. Although there are a few women who go to great lengths to avoid it like the plague, most of them can happily run through a week of boss-bestowed insults or unceremonious breakups, only on the hope of a weekend shopping spree.
What is it with women and their crazy ambition to own a gazillion pairs of shoes?
This one’s easy. Makeup is that one magical thing which quite literally holds the power to transform a woman; whether the transformation is for better or worse can be discussed on another day.
Ah! It would be a crime not to mention Marilyn Monroe’s declaration about women’s special friendship with diamonds right at the beginning, and the rest will be self-explanatory. Not trying to cut down on words here, but is there anything else which explains a woman’s fascination with sparklers more than this song from Gentlemen Prefer Blondes?
Female vanity works in mysterious ways. Stereotypes force us to believe that the female mind feels that she can never have enough LBDs/skinny or boyfriend pants. On investigating further, one feels hard-pressed to know why the men never have to justify their obsession with cars or gadgets. But the mere mention of a woman who skips dinner for a month to buy that Hermès scarf she so desires, raises instant outrage.
Okay, let me just say it. What choice do women have? Women getting attracted to men is a major natural order, and let’s stop being nasty about the hunter clan and look at reasons other than natural.
